Until We Meet Again

*Ted's Grandma Mary went home to Jesus on Saturday, June 15.  We will miss her dearly, but we rejoice in the hope of heaven that was hers and is also ours, knowing that our goodbye here is temporary, until we meet again in glory.*

 Last weekend, we made an unexpected trip to visit our Michigan home.  Memorial Day weekend, it was discovered that Ted's Grandma Mary has a brain tumor that is rapidly growing and there is nothing more they can do.  She is in a hospice center where the sweet nurses are doing everything they can to make her as comfortable as possible on her last days.  We knew, without a doubt, that we needed to make the trip to see her one last time, not only for our own hearts, but to support and love on Ted's Grandpa Breen, who has already had to say goodbye to his first wife years ago.  These goodbyes never, ever get easier.

Friday morning, Ted rode his bike to work for a meeting he needed to attend.  The kids and I ran some errands and then picked him up mid-morning with the van already packed for a quick whirlwind trip.  We left around 10:30 and made it to his parent's house around 7:30, just in time for a late dinner and play time before bed.  The kids did so well on the drive there, kept occupied most of the time by their new favorite movie, Wreck It Ralph.  (Side note: you can BUY movies from Redbox for only $5! Also, we don't have a DVD player for the van, but my laptop works just as well.)  Oliver was happy as long as mommy was sitting next to him...and as long as we stopped enough for him to gulp down more of mommy's milk.

The kids were so happy to have lots of space to run and explore.  They always have so much fun with Uncle Joey and Uncle Robby.  Ted helped his dad fix up an old bike from the garage for Joey and for the rest of our visit Valerie and Almanzo had fun racing him on their bikes.  It was beautiful weather all weekend and, as always, it was good to spend time with family.  We don't get to see Ted's family often enough, so we enjoy the opportunity whenever it comes.

Saturday morning, Ted and I went to a funeral for the mom of one of his childhood friends.  She battled a brain tumor for the past few years and finally went home to be with the Lord last week.  I had only met her a few times, but the service was packed with friends and family.  We took Oliver with us while Mackenzie graciously watched the big kids back at the house.  I was hoping Ollie would sleep through it, but he decided it was more fun to make as much noise as possible.

I finally got up to walk out with him, but the doors were locked, so I stood by the door bouncing him and trying to keep him quiet.  I was grateful for the few people who came up to me afterwards and said the best part was when he giggled at the piano player.  Babies always bring such comfort in times of loss, because they are a reminder of the gift of life.  It really was a beautiful service too, filled with messages of hope and truth and stories of a woman who loved the Lord and knew without a doubt that heaven awaited her.

After lunch, Ted and I took all three kids plus Mackenzie to the hospice center to visit with Grandpa Breen and say goodbye to Grandma Mary.  I was surprised by how calm and peaceful it was there.  The building is hidden in a wooded area and the rooms are decorated to feel like home.  The nurses were so gentle and caring to both Grandpa and Grandma.  Grandpa was so happy to see us, but it was hard to tell if Grandma Mary recognized us.

She was barely responsive, but resting much more calmly than Ted's mom had told us she had been.  It brought back so many memories for me and it was hard to see her so sick.  She did blink her eyes a few times as if she knew what was going on, but was unable to communicate with us.  She began to get a little restless after a little while, so we decided to sing to her.  As we sang, there was such an unexpected peace filling the room, because we were reminded of the hope of heaven that awaits her.

A friend of Grandma Mary came to visit while we were there along with her husband.  He brought his guitar along and they joined us in singing several hymns that Grandma Mary loved.  It was so beautiful to be a part of that circle of love for a woman who has lived a rich and full life and has been such a blessing to us.  As we prepared to leave, we each took a turn giving her one last kiss and whispering our goodbyes.

I was surprised when Valerie asked to say goodbye, because the kids were so nervous about seeing her so sick.  I picked her up and held her while she kissed her forehead.  Then, she whispered "I love you, Grandma" and it near broke my heart.  Almanzo walked over after I set her down and placed his hand in mind, silently asking to say goodbye too.  I could barely see through the cloud of tears as I watched him follow his sister's example.  Our kids have seen too many sad goodbyes already in their short little lives, but they have also been blessed with so much love and such tender hearts.  As Ted said goodbye and I saw him fighting to stay strong and hold back tears, I knew, as hard as it was, we needed to be there and I'm so glad we made the trip.

After we left the hospice center, we followed Grandpa to McDonald's to visit a little more and give him a little break from it all.  They have both been such a blessing to me, as they have loved me as their own grandchildren and encouraged our little family through so many of our own hard times.  Their steadfast faith and unwavering commitment to follow Jesus is truly an inspiration.  We enjoy every single visit with them and our hearts break knowing this was our last visit with Grandma Mary here on earth.

Sunday morning, we went to church and Sunday school with Ted's family, ate lunch, and then packed up to head home.  The drive home was long and exhausting for all of us after an emotional weekend.  The kids were getting restless from spending so much time in the van, so we tried to stop as often as possible, including a longer stop for dinner, but that meant we didn't get home until 11:00 at night.  Needless to say, we started the week out rather run down.  The kids have been praying every night for Grandma Mary "to feel better while she's dying" and for Grandpa Breen "to not be so sad".  Our hearts are aching, but we are grateful that our goodbye was really "until we meet again". 

Project Life 2012: Weeks 51 & 52 {Christmas}

December 16 - 22

This week was crazier than expected when Valerie ended up having tonsil/adenoid surgery.  We were also busy finishing up last minute things on our Christmas to do list like mailing out Christmas cards & baby announcements and packing for a week in Michigan visiting Ted's family.  I blogged more about the surgery here.

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December 23 - 30

Saturday morning, we packed up the van and began the long drive to Michigan.  With three kids, including a newborn, we knew we'd be stopping at least for lunch and dinner, so we braced ourselves for an entire day of driving.  We brought along my laptop with DVDs and plenty of toys to keep the kids entertained.  We stopped for lunch at Sarah & Dan's new house and enjoyed a break from traveling to visit with Sarah and little Danny. The rest of the drive went well, but we arrived at Ted's parents house just before midnight, exhausted and tired from a long day of travel.

Ted's older sisters, Sarah and Lisa, and his brother, David, were not able to travel home for Christmas this year, so it was a much quieter Christmas.  We enjoyed visiting with Ted's parents and attending the Hanes family gathering after church on Sunday.  The kids had a blast playing with (uncle) Joey and (uncle) Robbie.  Almanzo and Robbie are so funny together, giggling over the silliest things and chasing each other all over the house.  Almanzo says, "My like Robbie.  He's fun." 

Laura & Eric and Justin came over the weekend to visit as well.  Along with Mackenzie and Vickie, we all enjoyed staying up at night to watch some Hallmark Christmas movies Ted's mom had recorded on the TV.  There's something about a quiet night in the country in a home heated by a wood stove that just says Christmas to me.  It was so relaxing and the smaller gathering this year allowed us to spend some more one on one time with family members we don't get to see often enough.  


Christmas morning, the kids woke us up bright and early at 6.  We opened the gifts from our stockings and gave the kids their gifts from us before gathering with the rest of the family for breakfast.  After breakfast, Ted's dad read the nativity story straight from the bible and we all exchanged gifts.  We then enjoyed a Christmas lunch along with birthday cake for Jesus and a quiet afternoon nap before going to visit Ted's grandparents.  Mackenzie joined our little family and Ted's grandparents were so happy to see us all.  Having lost my own grandparents so recently, I know how precious time is so I cherished that time spent with Ted's grandparents. 

On Thursday morning, we packed up the van again and drove back home.  The drive home always seems longer, especially when we ended up driving through Chicago during rush hour.  At one point, in the middle of Chicago traffic that was almost at a stand still, all three kids were crying and I wanted to cry right along with them.  Somehow I managed to calm Ollie back to sleep and then put a movie on for Valerie and Almanzo that was just long enough to last until we stopped for dinner.  After dinner, the kids all fell asleep and we carried them into bed when we finally arrived home late that night. 

Friday morning, we packed the van yet again and drove to my parents' house.  We enjoyed Christmas with my family that night and then a Christmas gathering with my mom's family on Saturday.  It's a tradition every year for the cousins to perform a nativity play.  It was bittersweet to celebrate Christmas in my grandparents' home without them, but traditions like this keep their memory alive.  This year, my mom asked me to direct the play and my cousins came up with the most hilarious addition to our yearly tradition - the narrators read their lines southern preacher style and the actors sang their lines.  We were all laughing so hard by the end and the memories we made will last a lifetime. 

Project Life 2012: Weeks 48 - 50

November 25 - December 1



This was an emotionally draining week.  On Monday, I attended the funeral of a friend's newborn son, born the day after Oliver and on Friday, at MOPS, the pastor from Community Church spoke about hope in the midst of grieving as we all tried to process our friend's loss.  My kids, unfortunately, have experienced too many losses in their short life already and understand far more than we give them credit for.  During their play time, I often hear them talking about how great mommy got sick and died and one night, after talking about my friend's sick baby who died, Valerie was in tears.  She had the start of a cold and, as she coughed, she sobbed for daddy and gasped in between sobs, "I not want to die!"  We are grateful for the hope of heaven we are able to talk to our children about, but, still, the hard moments of life are so very hard to grasp, even as adults.  I took few photos this week, but instead stored up memories in my mind of precious moments spent simply living life with our little ones.  So, instead of a photo, I'm sharing a fun little video of our kids, because these are the moments that make the hard ones bearable. 

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December 2 - 8

This weekend, uncle Eric, aunt Laura, aunt Sarah, and cousin Danny came to visit and meet our Ollie.  Valerie and Almanzo had so much fun playing with cousin Danny, who quickly made himself right at home playing with their toys.  They made it just in time for lunch and then stayed for a couple hours to visit.  Oliver got plenty of cuddles with his aunt Sarah and aunt Laura and Almanzo had fun climbing all over uncle Eric.  We just wish they all lived closer so our visits weren't so few and far between!

The kids and I took a mini vacation this week to visit my sister, Kelly, and help her with Karli while she finished up her last semester of college classes.  The kids were so excited to have a sleep over with aunt Kelly and we loved having the extra time to spend with cousin Karli.  One of the nights we made a quick Target run with all four kids and then drove by the big lit up Christmas tree in the middle of downtown.  The kids were in awe of it.  On the way home from our visit, my mom met us to drop off some St. Nick's Day goodies for the kids.  I love that they still spoil us with little gifts like that. 

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December 9 - 15

 

We finally put up the Christmas tree this weekend and the kids just love staring at the lights.  We don't really do Santa in our house, because we want to focus on the One who came as a baby lying in a manger.  We decided last year to give our kids three gifts each, just like the three gifts the wise men gave Jesus.  We have a Fisher Price nativity set my parents bought the kids a few years ago and it's so sweet listening to them talk about the baby Jesus.  When we sit down for a family meal, we light our advent wreath and talk about the nativity story.  I just love watching them soak up these truths and hear their hearts for the Lord already.

We spent the rest of the week wrapping gifts, packing for our trip to Michigan for Christmas, and making these fun ornaments.  The kids had so much fun painting the ornaments to give to their aunts, uncles, and grandparents.  It's a good thing I had washable paint, old t-shirts for paint smocks, and disposable table cloths, because they made quite a big mess!

Our week ended with a college graduation party for my sister, Kelly.  I'm so proud of how hard she worked to gracefully balance being both a mommy and student.  She is totally a rock star in my book!  My parents held an open house at their home after the graduation ceremony and we celebrated with a house full of family and friends.